Category Archives: Family Life

Being a Support System

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Matthew will be full time in the Academy in three weeks. I have been spending a lot of time figuring out what that means for me; what it means to be an Academy wife. I have also been trying to figure out what it means to be a good wife. This quote from The Office somewhat sums it up for me:

“I’m like the office toilet. I take all the crap that comes in and flush it away, so that no one has to deal with it.”

Now, I really do not like calling myself a toilet, but I like the premise. I want to make all of the crap in Matt’s life disappear (and I know he feels the same). One main piece of crap right now is the Academy. Well, it is not necessarily crap but it is a bit daunting and a challenge. I met with a friend who has already been an Academy wife, and she gave me some great advice. She encouraged me to meal plan and prep snacks / lunches. Then I will be prepared for meals and not be resentful when he asks me to make those for him.

I have been a peanut butter & jelly making machine. Did you know you can make them ahead of time and freeze them? Shari told me that, and my freezer is now FULL of sandwiches. That 20 minutes (which is about how long it took to turn a whole loaf of bread into sandwiches) will save me a lot of time and griping later. I also bagged some snacks and put them in the fridge for easy access. Now Matt can just grab them and go.

As far as flushing out crap, there are lots of little things that I can help Matt out with. Prepping meals? Check. Putting gas in my car? Check. Laundry? Well that’s a half check! I also choose to speak highly of him in front of others. Building up our marriage with love and respect will prevent some crap from getting in. Matthew helps me out by protecting me emotionally and spiritually. How can you flush the crap out of your marriage?

Proverbs 31: Verse 29

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The last time we looked into Proverbs 31 was in November. We left off discussing how to be called blessed by others. I realized that I cannot change what people say or think of me, but I can change my actions and how I respond to situations. Let’s continue on and check out verse 29…

“Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.”

Running has brought us closer together and we're stronger than ever!

No idea where to go with this, really. How can I surpass women who do noble things? What is this verse saying about a wife and how can I apply it to my life? I have been thinking about this all week and I still have no idea where to go with it. The only thing that I can think of is to constantly strive to better myself and my marriage. There are many ways in which to do that. Our church has been going through the Courageous study (based on the movie), with the men and women separated. This is not usually our style, but it has been great for us to work through things on our own. Matt and I then discuss things at home and work on what we think needs to change. Our communication has gotten so much better through this. We have also started running together (boo!) and this gives us a lot of time to talk. I also meet with an older (than me) woman from church on Tuesday mornings and she helps me sort through my emotions and thoughts and become a better partner for Matthew. How can you better your marriage and “surpass” other women? What does this verse mean to you?

Proverbs 31: Verse 22

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Last week, we talked about preparing for the future.  This week we get to talk about today and what we wear!

She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

This is the first time that we have heard about what the Proverbs 31 woman looks like or wears.  She makes gorgeous coverings for her bed and wears beautiful clothes.  I bet she makes her “fine linen and purple” apparel as well!  This verse brings two things to mind:  our master bedroom and my wardrobe.  I used to be horrible at making the bed in the morning (even though I was forced to as a child / teen); but things have changed.  I realized that the two minutes it takes to pull back the sheets / comforter and throw pillows on the bed makes all the difference in the world.  Walking into the bedroom is now refreshing — I no longer sigh in disgust!  I have also started cleaning off my night stand every few weeks; it quickly becomes at catch-all for books and lip gloss and the like.  This cleaning definitely de-clutters the space.  Matthew has mentioned a few times how nice the bedroom looks — and you always want your bedroom to be a welcoming space, right?

In lieu of a picture of my clean room (because I don't have one), Emily has shared hers! Thanks, Em!

Now, her clothing.  She makes her own fabulous clothes.  This requires time management (again?), material, and style.  I may not have the time and energy to make my own clothes right now, but I can still apply this verse to my life.  This woman has style (purple and fine linen were the epitome of style) and frugality as we already learned.  I am going to work on being stylish with what is already in my wardrobe.  This means actually putting together daily outfits, not just throwing on jeans and whichever shirt is clean!  How can you apply this verse to your life?

Proverbs 31: Verse 21

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I am enjoying this study in Proverbs.  Spacing it out to one verse a week makes it much easier to swallow.  Let’s get down to this week’s verse:

When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

My "home" in Salzburg, covered in snow!

This verse shows us how a godly woman is prepared for the future.  She knows that the winter will come, but has already prepared her family for it.  The winter can be expected, but this verse also makes me think about what unexpected things I need to prepare for with my family.  Matt and I purchased a small emergency backpack for us, but we are planning to create a larger emergency supply kit as well.  We have been buying large bottles of water and plan to get non-perishables or dehydrated food to last us a week!  What have you done to plan for future emergencies or just the winter?

Is TV Taking Over Your Life?

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Is TV taking over your life? That may seem like an  question to ask, but it’s something that I’ve noticed lately. Young married women (at least the ones I hang out with) tend to watch a lot of TV. Mostly stupid TV. Dare I even say that they’re addicted? I might be one of them. While I might not think I’m addicted I catch myself talking about TV nonstop. (Although, I am probably addicted to reading blogs as much and talking to my friends who read them, too.) At work and with friends, I always find myself chatting about what was on the latest episode of some show.

Anyone else excited for the Big Brother finale?

It’s fun to talk about, but I realize that I could be doing something much more productive with my time. Do you ever find yourself thinking that too? Or are you totally not into TV? Most evenings in our house are spent watching at least a couple hours of TV. (Much of that is me on the computer blogging, too.) It’s easy to say that Matt and I are spending time together, but it’s not exactly quality time. I often say that I’m willing to give up the TV, but it’s just such a staple that it would be weird not to have it. There’s also the big debate (especially in the design world) as to whether there should be a TV in the bedroom or not.

I don’t really know where I’m going with all this, except maybe to find out if anyone else feels like they spend more quality time with their TV than with their spouse, family or friends. We’ve been getting better at having people over — after we drop our lame excuses not to hang out with people — and I hope that we will continue to do that. Heck, even having people over to watch TV — like when we had our mini Bachelor finale party — makes it a better experience.

So how much TV do you watch a week? Would you ever consider giving up some of that time to spend more quality time with you family and friends?

 

 

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